Never, ever did I imagine I’d be writing this post. And why I thought I’d be one of the lucky few that deliver their baby within a safe window a week or two before their due date is now totally beyond me, especially because everything I’ve read and heard from friends indicated that most first-time moms deliver late. And my mom delivered all three of us at least a few days after our due dates, so… yeah. Delusion and positive thinking, apparently!

It’s week 40, day 2, and our little guy still seems pretty comfy in the belly. On Friday, our doctor gave us some good news: I’m 1cm dilated and about 50% effaced. Good progress considering both were at 0 the week prior! She also performed a membrane sweep, which I didn’t find painful at all. She asked if I have a high pain tolerance which is hilarious because I would think I have anything but that — but perhaps I’ve never known my own strength!?

Later that day, I went to a new acupuncturist and came home SURE that we’d be heading to the hospital within a day or so since I was feeling a lot of cramps in my lower abdomen and back. There was really no discernible pattern, though, and by the next morning everything had come to a screeching halt.

So, here we sit on Monday morning, wondering when our little man will make his way into the world. I wrapped up work at the end of last week so I’m trying to enjoy these days of relaxation, though I admit the feeling of limbo is so disorienting it’s hard to keep things in perspective. Logically, I know he’ll probably be here within a week but it’s so, so hard to deal with the anticipation of labor and delivery. This mama-to-be has officially read too many birth stories online.

Baby:

Is the size of a small pumpkin! The average baby is about 7.5 lbs at this point, and our doctor thinks he’s on par with the average, though I still think he’ll be bigger than that at about 8.5 lbs. He seems to be running out of room because while I still feeling him moving often, his movements are less pronounced and sharp. I’ve read that he’s likely to have shed all of the vernix and lanugo at this point (taking the little wins where I can get them with this delayed delivery!) and I just can’t stop looking at our 3D ultrasound pictures of him, wondering how he’ll look out here in the real world.

Physical:

All in all, not too bad. Weeks 37 and 38 were not great, and to be honest I can’t tell if I’ve just adjusted to everything being uncomfortable or whether it’s eased up a bit in the last week. But either way, I’m hanging in there. I’ve been making myself walk miles every day which counterintuitively seems to be helping physically and the mental benefits are huge, of course.

Before experiencing pregnancy, I would have sworn I’d be bed-bound by this date on the calendar. I may be pretty slow and walking with a serious waddle, but I’m grateful to feel as decently as I do. I feel really lucky that my sleep continues to be pretty decent (despite a minimum of 5 nightly trips to the bathroom!) and I’m sure that contributes to me hanging in there physically.

The swelling is relatively under control, but my rings are definitely off for the time being, and most of my shoes that aren’t flip flops are not very comfortable.

Emotional:

Well, most of this I’ve covered above. This time is such a rollercoaster. I’ll wake up so crabby, in total disbelief that I’m heading into another day with no signs of baby and then get out for a walk and snap out of it, feeling grateful for nice weather, some days of rest before baby comes, and the best husband in the world.

No surprise, but Jason has been so great throughout this whole experience and particularly the last weeks. He’s covered more than his share of day to day chores around the house, gives me nightly tennis ball massages, and is always able to cheer me up and provide the perspective I need when I’m in a funk and convinced I can’t be pregnant for one more day.

So, we’ll see where the rest of the week takes us. Perhaps I’ll be posting a 41-week update a week from now and heading into an induction… but I have my fingers crossed for our little guy to make his appearance in the next few days.